Monthly Archives: April 2019

Recently, I have run into many single mothers looking for relationships using online dating sites. Some had been in a serious relationship for many years not met online beforehand and not realizing how times have changed with how dating starts and ends. In this article, I want to point out the dangers for single mothers seeking a new start using online dating services.

When placing up a personal ad, be sure to have your main picture holding your child (children) or standing next to them. This will show your children are more important than meeting a man and the man is not necessary just an added benefit. Most online predators seeking just sex from vulnerable women don’t read if the person has children, or expect your best friends/family to take care of them so you can go home with the guy.

Another way to filter sexual deviants is to write in your profile area that you are a 24/7 mother (like on described) and very little time available to spend going out with someone. If they reply, most likely they are willing to make the effort to being there as a friend and relationship because they understand what they will have to endure to be with you. Try to find a man who also has a child (or children) so you can relate to taking care of them and understanding they come first.

Here are some ways to find a good man online or even while out are:

  1. Asks why you and the ex are separated or divorced and goes into detail of why they are as well.
  2. Asks how you like to spend your time.
  3. Asks about your children’s interests, how old they are, how you like to spend your time with them.
  4. The man doesn’t live for an hour or more away.
  5. If the site has a “Favorites” section, be sure he doesn’t have a lot of females listed, it shows they are keeping their options open and not focusing in on one person. The term “Player” is usually what these men turn out to be, using the ego boosting from multiple women wanting or being around them.
  6. Try to find a man closer to your age, younger men usually tend to seek multiple women to be with on the side. Older men can be the same way, but more likely to settle into a serious relationship.
  7. Avoid men who ask for your number to talk, make them earn it. Tell them you will call them using a private number or use * 67 so they will not have your number until you are ready to give them it.
  8. Avoid men who have on their personal information “Drinks Socially” or “Drinks Often”, uses drugs or smokes. Your child’s health is and should be the most important thing.
  9. Avoid men who have ex-girlfriends as best friends, this is usually a red flag because they can easily go back to a physical relationship or the ex can try to break off a new relationship out of jealousy or despite. If they have children, the mother of the child (children) is an understandable equation to have to be just as the father of yours would be as well.
  10. Be sure they have truly read your profile and not skimmed through it. If they ask something that is plainly written on your profile, this means they saw your picture and sex is all they are interested in. This has happened to me with women that have seen my profiles online as well.
  11. Avoid men whose profile is very shortly written. If they state they like partying, bars and such…they are not worth you and your child’s time.
  12. Remember as well, find a man who wants children (even if not their own) someday. Your child can get attached to them, resent them as well. Most importantly, don’t let your children have to go through as many men as well. This can do lots of emotional damage later to them. So, try not to date around, it can confuse the child. In some cases, females who grow up seeing their mother with multiple partners can grow up thinking that’s natural to have. This lead to early pregnancy, STDs and multiple partners as well.
  13. Avoid men who play online games, it’s a way for them to meet others and not spend time with you or even cheat.
  14. Avoid men who are “Separated”, this 9 out of 10 times means they are not. Cheaters use this as an excuse to see other women, keeping the wife as the stable factor of steadiness.

It’s sad to see people have sunk into so much deceit and manipulative ways just for a thrill or more. Single moms beware of the predators, they can charm you and use you with a click of a mouse. Screen through these potentially dangerous people by being as cautious like stepping on a landmine. Check their profiles thoroughly, the less it written, the more to avoid. Your child should come first in all events of dating, be sure the person who wishes to spend time with you understands your child will be part of most, if not all your, events.

I am currently talking with a mother of two whom I had interest in over 10 years ago, and I am willing to try to be the best friend I can for her. She is the reason I have written this article and she is a person I would love to spend my time around and show her that not all men are scum. If you read this Christie, I hope you’d be willing to give this man a chance at showing you a bigger world out there.